The concept of weightage given to any event in our lives is entirely personal priority. However certain occasions I feel are accepted unanimously as landmark. Just as every mother and child are tied by the umbilical cord so also cutting it at birth does not ever mean emotional separation.
Can any mother appreciate the feeling of not being physically present for your child’s wedding. I am obviously not looking for an opinion poll. It’s just a personal gush of memories and thoughts that can torment some women.
As a child is born the wonderful journey of parenting starts, there begins healing of the child birth pain with all the outpouring of endorphins from maternal instincts. Nobody can naturally love a child as much as the mother who’s conceived, grown and borne a baby. It is difficult to sink into the reality that there may be a reason for a mom to miss out on such an important day of the child’s life.
After birth a very important day is obviously the occasion of the child’s wedding. There will be people who believe this is weird thinking. Thanks but I am not looking for you today.
It also depends on how one lines up each their own priorities. For a family who is on the path of immigration the equations are balanced a little differently. I want to see my sons settled comfortably with their soulmates at a time when they are looking for genuine companionship. Every first generation immigration has to handle the trauma of separation, loneliness and insecurities a little differently. I am that mother who has decided to not stand in between my childrens aspirations and ground realities. This wedding at this timing within 3 months of my last visit had to be planned because of better reasons.
For me juggling between the official formalities and responsibilities of a government job and the role of a mother were not easy to be sorted out. I did what my limitations said. But I am ok.
It’s a big day I am missing out in person. I am thankful to the almighty that Raja, Jessica and Alana are there. Mampu, Matu deserve a special thanks.
But my dear Jeet and Kylie, Ma loves you with all her heart and soul. Forgive me for my physical absence. But emotionally I am holding you.
God bless you my children.
28th October 2023
One reply on “A Big day !”
Hugs, Madhumita. Your life, your choices. Brave choices. Few can dare to choose like you. Love to the young couple