Month: August 2025

Humans have this tendency to believe that once we are passed 18 we are all matured in every field of life. This is more so with academically brilliant persons. These people display excellence in the pursuit of knowledge and hence have a tendency to trust that everything else in life move in harmony with intelligence. Unfortunately the greatest reality about life is besides academics all other forms of maturity come not from perseverance, it comes from facing real life situations and rising above obstacles and failures.

A matured person may not have a lot of educational qualifications but they are real life geniuses. If a person is not surged with adrenaline in day to day upheaval’s of life it’s not because he is brilliant or educated, it’s because he has learnt to adjust the sail of his life’s boat with the direction of the roaring winds of life and the storms from time to time. The more protected and disciplined a life you have led the lesser tuned you are to handle these uncertainities.

No form of maturity be it emotional, sentimental or handing freaks of day to day living can be learnt from any text. Life teaches us through situations. It’s meaningless to believe that just because some one is brilliant they are fit to handle everything. Life never fails to teach us with every struggle we survive through.

That farmer who always prays for the rains and struggles with the soil everyday knows the trick of the game far better than any scientist. The experience to facing odds actually prepares us for greater adversities. Books enrich our knowledge but problems enrich our skills.

Some of the indices of maturity are:

• Ability to find a good in every person
• Ability to percieve every person’s limitations
• Soaking into the fact that I am not all knowledgeable
• humility
• empathy
• optimism in the darkest hour
• Ability to understand that every situation does not need my expert comment.
• We are all here on a temporary journey called life, nothing is permanent, our power, position, relations, friendship, no possession.
• finally all our fortunes and misfortunes are also a part of this changing scenerio.

A matured person is as such not a measure of one’s age or social position or academic qualifications. Matured is a person who can smile in an unpalatable situation with the same amount of genuineness as in a really blissful position. They understand that every standpoint does not call for their criticism. At the same time they also know how to juggle out their views in a circumstance where it’s absolutely mandatory.

Such people usually can earn the love and respect of most categories of persons they gel with.

As days roll on in life, all of us reach a stage when we no longer care about what people say. This is the stage when we’ve learnt to handle sarcasm. The less experienced we are with life the more conscious are we about what people say and feel. When perceptions and beliefs have set in to our roots we start to feel confident about our moves.

However, a section of supposedly enlightened intellectuals who believe they are way ahead of everyone else may turn to be pinching and fault finding in day to day life. They fail to realise that this world has it’s own variety. Not everyone loves the same kind of meal, outfit, profession or lifestyle. There is’t any need for judgement or sour comments.

Judgemental people for reasons best known to them are never appreciated. We adults mingle in the society only for social exchange of thoughts, mutual admiration of living and if possible a helping hand in distress.

When life rolls on different tracks of careers, it’s only the wearer who knows where his foot hurts. Instead of pouncing on every other person be it in public or in private and creating surges of adrenaline, it’s part of maturity to be appreciative and adjusting.

Even your own children or sibling wouldn’t accept sarcasm in anyway.

However, the section of unhealthy sarcastic intelligent people survive enjoying their hobby least realising how unacceptable they evolve to be.

May such sarcastic critics live on in their paradise and the rest of the world sail on in their diverse colourful lives.

There are times when I wonder if given a chance to revisit parenting what would I do different. I have been a mother to two boys who have proved to be brilliant, accomplished and independent good humans. The challenge we faced was to loose their father when one was just over 14 years and another a little over 6 years. With family support in the form of my parents coming over whenever needed for that physical presence and emotional support on the major crossroads, we were otherwise sailing independently.

The predicament of raising funds to realise dreams of gifted ambitious children is indeed exhausting. There were times when juggling motherhood and fatherhood messed up my spirit and emotions. Insecurities galore and I am sure at times I was a nagging mom and at other times a completed disconnected confused soul. Learning where to hold and when to let go honestly at the right time cannot be calculated without the mistakes committed in the process.

Least did my kids know how dependent I was on their dad. He not only catered to our family needs but also never allowed me to soak into many of the hurdles we sailed by. Finances was something I learnt to handle only after he was gone. The first time I wrote a cheque for their school was a life changing moment for me. I told myself that yes I will now on raise every penny myself and never allow shadows of uncertainty of education, meals and health ever grip my children.

The promise was made inside me, but the realisation of the same was a herculean task. I confess that I slipped, fell, tripped, got lost but somehow moved on to that one single goal… “A great future for my boy”. I let go friends, opportunities and many simple pleasures of life only to hold on to my goal.

Looking back I understand that all my insecurities were centered around the fear of loosing myself before the journey got over. Honestly I always thought what would happen if I die along the way.

My primary focus was to make them independent. The importance of teaching then to make a simple meal, to drive and to survive alone was my priority. I always tried to morbidly save for the future and also give them whatever best I could on that day.

Sons I know I am not a flawless mom nor did I ever try to be one but I can honestly tell you I am a focussed, dedicated mom even today.

Looking back I feel I could have been a little more complacent with all that was happening. I could have trusted the process of our moulding into where we’ve reached today. The insecurity of loosing myself was real but the trust in this universe put everything into place.

I have to apologise for all my undue upheavals for the clouds of uncertainties that gripped me from time to time.

Now as I sit back and reflect on the past I am only thankful.

The next journey and concern ahead is definitely my survival in solitude that I am in. I should admit that I enjoy my space but the concern now is what if I fall a prey to issues I cannot handle alone.

The faith in this universe where we three sailed not knowing where the shores are is definitely because the wind adjusted our sail. Even now I work, pray and carry on for myself and trust the journey till I dock my ship.